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So...where do you want to eat?
August 8, 2008 - Wes Burns
"Anywhere. Where do you want to eat tonight?"
"I don't care. Where do you want to eat?"
"I don't care, anything you want is fine."
"I really don't care."
Ever heard this conversation before? If you've ever lived in the Midwest you not only have heard this conversation but grudgingly take part. You get more than two people in a room and somebody makes the mistake of proposing that you go get a meal. One could reasonably expect that educated, reasonable adults would be able to come quickly to consensus; rather the proposer is met with an impenetrable wall of indecision and vagueness.
Don't you people care about food? Or even have a sense of what you like and dislike? Are your friends going to leave you if you want to eat Mexican food while they want to eat Chinese? Its this apathy towards dining that fosters the environment where the number one restaurant in town is Applebees.
Does anybody remember when the Applebee's opened in M-Town? You would have thought that the Allies were liberating our occupied city! Oh happy day! Finally a place where I can get spinach and artichoke dip! What's that? Both cheeseburgers AND steak? Great day in the morning!
While I would love to heap the scorn on "The Bees" our Apple Buddies are not the problem. We love chain restaurants. Every time some corporate restaurant chain decides that the market is big enough to support another burger joint in Marshalltown we the citizenry whip our selves into some dollar-menu obsessed frenzy.
Remember when the opened Culvers? This is a restaurant that, despite the recent acknowledgments by the medical communities that fast food may be harmful to your health, has continued to loudly advocate the sale of their Butter Burger. In case you don't know that is a burger patty that has been dipped in butter, then grilled. Wow.
They opened a Sonic a few months back in the Wal-Mart parking lot. A parking lot! And yet people were lined around the block trying to get a burger from the last place on the planet to use Styrofoam burger boxes. You can still use those?
When people ask you what you want to eat and you have no idea is it because you don't care or because all of our restaurants blur into one giant burger grill and you don't make a choice because you can't tell them apart? My advice: eat at Sub-City; its deliciousness by the foot and doesn't taste like anywhere else.
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