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January 31, 2013 - David Alexander
I didn’t think it was possible, but my cat is lazier than I am.
Now, I am not trying to say that I am a malingerer or I try to avoid work. No, I simply mean that most of the things I enjoy—reading, writing, watching movies—don’t require me to move much. Although I enjoy playing hockey and boxing, I am not, by my nature, someone who enjoys physically exerting his self for the sake of doing so. I am content simply to sit in front of my computer reading and drinking coffee into perpetuity.
And apparently that lack of gusto has transferred over to my cat, Batman. Or maybe he is that way by default. I suppose I cannot really know. Some time ago, I bought a laser pointer as a toy. I have always enjoyed other people’s cats and how much they go nuts for the dancing light. On the back of the package, little graphics showed a cat’s “needs—their need to hunt, their need to play, etc.” This particular toy was supposed to satisfy my cat’s need for exercise. Naturally, I figured my cats would share the same enthusiasm as others. And, at first, they did. But at this point, Batman will simply watch dancing around following the light for a few seconds then he will just watch it as I flicker it about. Eventually I get bored, grab a soda and a cigar and curl up on the couch, where Batman promptly joins me.
Part of me wants to believe that he is just getting keen to the idea that he cannot actually catch the light. But I am all too aware that when people describe their pets, they are often just describing how they see themselves. So if that’s the case, I suppose I need to be realistic. I am lazy. And Batman and I are kindred spirits.