I think our outdoors writers here at the Times-Republican are going to have to sit me down and give me a scolding.
You see, I decided to fish with my daughter over the weekend and the brief outing didn't go so well.
That's what happens when the amateurs like me hit the waters during the free fishing weekend.
Our outing occurred Sunday and was a last-minute decision to combine it with a trip to a park. It was so last minute that I dug at the side of my house for bait just a few minutes before we left.
I was only able to find a few small worms and we were off. We went to creek a few miles away and my expectations were pretty low for catching a fish.
We put one of those small worms on the hook then I had some trouble casting. My cheap, hardly-used fishing pole then needed to have the line let out by hand. It really didn't add to the patience level of our daughter.
Well, worm one was not successful and part of it either broke off or was eaten in the creek.
Worm two was even more embarrassing. I fixed it on pretty firm and then sunk the line back in the water.
A minute later, a pack of about 5 minnows crowded around the worm and ate it.
It was like the minnows were laughing at me as if to say "that's all you got?"
I was being outsmarted by minnows in front of one of my kids.
I think we put a third worm on but I don't remember how that one took. I was too traumatized by those insulting creek minnows.
So our fishing adventure came back with a coffee cup with dirt in it, no fish but a few fun memories.
The good news when you go fishing and don't catch anything is that you don't have to remove that slimy fish from the hook - so that was a win.
As you can see, I might have some learning to do before my next fishing adventure - especially if we want to actually catch some fish and not get mocked by them.
And I'll leave those wimpy worms behind.
Reporter Andrew Potter is a Tuesday columnist for the Times-Republican. The views expressed in this column are personal views of the writer and don't necessarily reflect the views of the T-R. Contact Andrew Potter at 641-753-6611 or firstname.lastname@example.org