By BECKY BROWN and DEB WILLIAMS

Do you feel sad amidst the holiday festivities? For some, the holidays can come with an unwanted gift. They can be a painful reflection, loneliness, anxiety, and depression. This pervasive sadness is known informally as holiday blues or holiday depression.

ANYONE can experience the holiday blues — even those who love the season. The season’s demands, gatherings, decorations, and other stressors leave many stressed and exhausted.

The most common symptom of holiday depression is a persistent or recurring feeling of sadness that begins during the holiday season. Other signs and symptoms include: changes in appetite or weight, changes in sleep patterns, depressed or irritable mood, difficulty concentrating, feelings of worthlessness or guilt, feeling more tired than usual, feeling tense, worried, or anxious, and loss of pleasure in doing things you used to enjoy.

People might experience the holiday blues for many reasons, such as: lack of sleep, excess eating and alcohol use, financial stress, isolation, and unrealistic expectations. Some reasons why these may lead to holiday blues are: a hectic holiday can lead to a lack of sleep, which increases stress. Sometimes people turn to unhealthy eating and alcohol use to handle the holiday sadness and stress. These can make the symptoms of the holiday blues even more pronounced. If you overextend yourself financially or struggle to afford gifts for family and friends you can be creating an added burden of financial stress. If you are unable to spend the holidays with your family or friends it can seem especially lonely.

Treating the holiday blues is usually done with lifestyle changes and social support. The holiday blues are usually short-term, talking to a mental health professional can help. A therapist can help you identify patterns of negative thinking that contribute to sadness and depression, replacing those thoughts with more helpful ones. These different thoughts can help you develop better stress management, communication, and relationship skills that can help you through these times.

Other things you can do to help deal with the holidays are: DRINK ONLY IN MODERATION — alcohol is a depressant, and drinking too much can exacerbate negative feelings; DON’T ISOLATE YOURSELF — if you’re on your own, reach out and find social support. If you can’t go home for the holidays, ask a friend to come over for a heart-to-heart. Try volunteering for something you believe in. EXERCISE REGULARLY — regular physical activity can help prevent or reduce your symptoms. Hitting the gym can be tough when you feel stressed, busy, and sad, but you don’t need to be glued to the treadmill, bike, or weight machine to feel the benefits. Even a casual activity like a short walk each day might be enough to keep the holiday blues at bay. LEARN TO SAY ‘NO’–the holidays often mean more people asking for help and making demands on your time and resources. Invites can turn into stressful obligations. Small favors can turn into huge projects that you didn’t foresee. Avoid overcommitting by knowing and respecting your limits by saying “no”. FIND TIME FOR YOURSELF — make sure that you leave enough time for yourself to relax. Even 15 to 20 minutes a day to enjoy some quiet time, read a book, listen to music, take a bath, do yoga, or some other relaxing activity can do wonders for your stress levels. SET REALISTIC EXPECTATIONS — it’s fine to be excited about the holidays and make plans for the things you want to do. But it is also important to keep your expectations realistic and reachable. Holidays change just as people change. Kids grow older, people move, and new people will become a part of your life. The key is to focus on those connections, create new traditions, and remember past holidays with fondness while still enjoying the one right in front of you. Focus on enjoying the experience and the time you get to spend with your loved ones rather than on achieving a picture-perfect end result.

If you experience the holiday blues and would like some extra support, you can reach out to Becky and Deb at Together We Can. We would be glad to offer you our support. You can reach us at (515) 391-3233 or stop by at 8 W. Church St.

——-

Becky Brown and Deb Williams are the cofounders of Together We Can, a mental health nonprofit based in Marshalltown.