The silent illness. The quiet struggle. The painful journey. The tragic end. Day in and day out, we are witnessing the increasing number of lives lost to suicide. Even in rural and tight-knit communities like Marshall County, we are not immune from this public health concern. The proverbial “Why?” is often asked after the fact and a statistic is given. Behind every statistic there is a person (a sibling, a parent, a grandparent, a neighbor, a classmate, a coworker or extended family member) who may have been struggling silently with brain health pain that intensified over time. Choosing to end life is not caused by a single factor; often it is the result of a complex mix of mental, emotional and behavioral illness, stressful life events, trauma, isolation, substance use, and a prevailing sense of hopelessness.

Statistics show that those who complete suicide first struggled with depressed mood, prior mental and emotional health problems, or a history of suicidal thoughts. Some individuals disclose their intent before an attempt, especially younger individuals which underscores the importance of being aware and engaged. So what can we do to help?

Every one of us plays a vital role in suicide prevention. We can become more equipped to help by learning to recognize key warning signs and knowing how to respond with care and urgency. Many times, our fear of not knowing what to say might keep us from helping; it is uncomfortable; we might not have the tools to give relief. Yet, your care and your presence matters. Here are a few simple ways we can be of assistance and start the conversation.

Open up the conversation with the individual who is experiencing feelings of hopelessness, being trapped, or being a burden to others. A simple question like “Are you thinking about suicide?” can open the door to a lifesaving conversation. It is direct yet compassionate. When asked directly it does not increase risk, but invites honesty. Let the person share their feelings while you hold space with empathy and care, without minimizing their pain. Be genuinely present and listen without judgement.

Any conversation about wanting to die or making plans for suicide is a serious warning sign. Listen to understand what is communicated. Additionally, notice behavior changes in the person such as sudden withdrawal, increasing alcohol or drug use, reckless behavior, severe mood swings, sleeping too much or too little, or giving away prized possessions could all be signals that someone is in distress.

There are times when someone who is considering self-harm will be reluctant to receive help. Be available and present to them at that moment. Connect them to help. Encourage immediate connection with crisis resources, such as the 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline (call or text 988), Your Life Iowa (855-581-8111), National Suicide Prevention Lifeline (800-272-8255). Support them in reaching out to trusted loved ones, faith leaders, counselors, or local mental health providers. Use Urgent Care at Center Associates for immediate need. If someone is in imminent danger, call 911 or take them to the nearest emergency department.

The support does not stop at the point the individual seeks help. It will continue as recovery doesn’t happen overnight. Staying in touch and checking in regularly can make someone feel truly supported and less alone. Hope can feel distant to someone deep in despair, but as a community we can shape an environment where people feel seen, valued, and supported. Encouraging someone to see that their pain is not permanent, that help exists, and that others genuinely care creates a lifeline where there once was only isolation.

Let’s become a community that truly cares for one another; listens to each other; willing to drop the facades of caring and be active in caring. Let us change our community for the better. We say “we are MarshalltownStrong.” Let us be MarshalltownCares. Let’s not wait for tragedy to happen; let us do everything to prevent the absence of one more life. We can, when we come together, reduce stigma around discussing emotional pain. Every conversation that acknowledges a person’s struggle without judgment is a step toward healing. Marshalltown, we can do this… You matter and caring for one another is how we will thrive.

——-

Dr. Paul Daniel, Ph.D., LMHC, is the executive director of Center Associates in Marshalltown.